Wednesday, November 2, 2011

would a teddy bear take offense?

stress. stress for me is usually pretty easy to walk away from. someone stresses me at work--well, i might stop and have a drink, but i'm not taking it home with me. an hour away from work and i'm usually pretty rock solid and happy as a clam again. someone stresses me in my personal life, and my solution is even simpler. walk away, tell them off if they force the issue and walk away, or simply analyze the entire situation and realize how pointless the stress is. life is just too short.

but i'm a chick and chicks vent. oh yes, we do. the only women that i've ever met that didn't have the urge, or even the need to vent, are for all intensive purposes men or extremely manipulative nutjobs that aren't worth a blog. i've probably not been venting enough lately. my best friend is really busy this time of the year. y'all know i haven't been blogging much. and i'm not one to really overshare if i'm not in a good mood. i always believe good moods are contagious, and i like the idea of spreading good cheer. no matter what happens when, i'm not venting to my kids...childhood (even the teen years) shouldn't be about my problem du jour.

of course, venting isn't just about alleviating stress. sometimes, it's just thinking aloud. you can't vent to yourself in a mirror though--unless you're telling yourself what an idiotic mistake that was. it just comes off so phony. you just can't nod in understanding at yourself unless you're sybil. (look it up people if you're too young to know.) besides venting isn't just about getting it out of your system. sometimes venting is just about having someone that will listen.

now i have all kinds of hurdles to overcome when venting. i don't like to vent to just anyone. i only vent to people i trust, and frankly, i have layers of trust. i trust my boys, but it wouldn't happen while they're young and it wouldn't happen ever depending on the issue. there are just somethings your children should never know about you and vice versa. if i ever had a doubt, an ex-boyfriend and his mother completely convinced me. that crazy woman didn't need to be telling his little brother (a thirty-somethinger at the time) about how he couldn't because of size *shutter* sexually please a woman in front of his older brother's girlfriend at the time (moi) or any of the other crazy stuff those people thought was appropriate discussion. my boys just don't need to know, nor do i need to know. i haven't seen any of them naked since they were like 7 or 8 (and by accident i'm pretty sure) and would very much prefer it to stay that way. hell, i get uncomfortable when my middle one refers to his belly hair as his "happy trail"...*ugh*...

another hurdle is that many of my closest friends are almost always guys. yea, can't always tell them everything either. don't get me wrong, i have very open honest discussions with my guy friends, but there are levels of sharing, lines that just don't get crossed. one guy i might tell about how my date went, while another one who is just as good of a friend, i wouldn't dream of mentioning who i even went out with for fear of listening to a lecture on my dating habits. not that my dating habits are really that much to talk about--let's see...i'm trying to remember the last time i went on a date...oh begeebis... anywho, there's always an opinion that comes out of my guy friends (men really are opinionated, ask any woman) about what i'm saying and sometimes, well, i don't really want their opinion. thus why it's called venting instead of trolling for advice. i ask questions when i'm trolling for advice. men volunteer, by nature, resolution, solution and opinions. (yes, women can volunteer opinions too, but their opinions are usually based on personal experience rather than resolute solution guidance opinions.) obviously, at this point, i can rule out talking to anyone of my guy friends...

of course, i have female friends too, but unfortunately, some of them have been going through some really bad times and they certainly don't need to listen to me whine. on the other hand, the other ones are going through some really great times and i'm not a selfish enough b*tch to whine to someone who's life is going really well. *sigh*

i'd like to say that i could resolve it on my own. well, time heals all now, doesn't it? but truth is it's not just one thing. there's a slew of things all come to their hind legs at the same time. it doesn't happen often. maybe 3 to 6 times a year. i still sleep sound as a baby most of the time. nothing is worth getting myself worked up into a tizz over unless it's fun. i'm just so high energy that i've learned over the years it's just easier to try to forget about it than to worry about it. expounding that much energy on something negative is wasted energy, in my opinion (hahaha, right? oh kay, back on point). if i'm going to expend that much energy, well, i'd prefer to have it well spent on fun--of course, at this point, my neck is in pain, my back is starting to hurt and i feel tired. the bottle is a tad overfull. the stress isn't really affecting the mind, but the body is not happy. i'm going to have to find a vent point somewhere...

would it be weird to vent at a teddy bear? teddy bears are usually pretty good listeners, don't profer up advice where not asked for, and don't take any offense by colorful language. hmmmm....

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