Lately I've been wondering why so many of my female friends and acquaintances have been dating GenY and even Millennium babies. I realize that there's always been gold digging women, but gold digging guys? However, I've come across a lot of GenY women, and even a lot of Millennium babies lately. (I call them babies because yes, they were friggin' babies when I had my babies.) An unfair amount of them seem to be looking for sugar daddies. The minute a guy says something about a house, good job, et cetera, they seem to be swooning--what could only be described as pathetic on their parts. The end result is that GenX and even Baby Boomer men are in even shorter supply for those of us their age, and well, we have to compensate or be alone. Interesting conundrum, if we think about it.
First, I've got a lot of female friends that are wonderful women that are alone. Not for lack of trying, but the first younger piece of tail to walk by and smile and a lot of guys our age will kiss the proverbial buttocks of that chicky half their age. Kind of leaves a bitter taste in some of my friends' mouths. Guys their own age or just a bit older won't give them the time of day. Most of the time my friends remind me that I have it easy since most people assume that I'm in my late 30s instead of mid-40s. Yes, really easy. (Feel the sarcasm.) I've dated two guys considerably younger than me, at least by female standards. Women typically limit ourselves, or at least used to, to men no more than 5 years younger than ourselves. We still tend to think of men as our protectors--in spite of the whole Suffragette dream of us being completely autonomous of needing protection, and it's difficult to see a man that is too much younger as the protector. But yes, both of my last 2 serious relationships--I can call them that since they both lasted over a year--were with guys more than 8 years younger than me. One was more than 10 years younger. Both looked older than me, which didn't bother the younger one much--at all really. The problem with that relationship is that while we seemed to be on the same page for a lot of things he lied about pretty much everything. He always told me what I wanted to hear. It took me a while to figure out that he would listen intently to everything I said and then simply regurgitate my own opinion to me. That was fun for a while, but eventually as the truth started trickling out, it was dismally disheartening. The next one began telling everyone how old I was and referring to me as his sugar mama. Like he needed to make sure that everyone knew. That was actually even more frustrating. It was really insulting. Most men are not as good at being the younger person in a couple generally. It's a societal truth and most women realize it immediately. So with a lack of men our own age to choose from, many of us are opting to be alone.
Of course, when we talk of the Suffragette dream, it most definitely wasn't girls chasing after men 20 years their senior in hopes of getting everything paid for. Hell if anything that is the complete opposite of the dream. Yes, I know that some of those relationships really work, but here's a newsflash: There's not many. A relationship is difficult enough without having to pretend to be someone we are not, like things that we have no idea what a man is talking about, and pretend to be attracted to someone that...well, not to be callous, but isn't actually physically attractive to us. A couple weeks back, I met this attorney. He's in his late 60s and his now ex-wife is younger than I am, like just turned 40. He's pissed off that she is now collecting alimony after being married to him for over just 10 years, he's paying child support for a kid that she doesn't seem very interested in (shocking how a money grubbing whore will give birth to get money--like the man has never heard the stories of welfare babies), and has a 22 year old boy toy living in the house that he paid for. I listened for a bit then realized that he was in fact hitting on me. Oh my. I told him I wasn't interested. He went on and on about how much money he had, how successful he was, and how he would treat me. Finally after trying to be nice, I cut him off and told him bluntly. I wasn't a money grubbing whore like his ex-wife and I was sorry but that he had gotten what he paid for. He didn't understand. I told him that he wanted his ego stroked, wanted the arm candy, and now was paying for it. In fact, he had been paying for it all along. That's one hell of retirement plan right there. She screws a man that grosses her out for money, has a kid with him, and as soon as the 10 year marker went by, kicked him to the curb and cashed in on her cow. Now she has the money to screw around with someone that she actually is attracted to, even reverse the tables, and is probably very aware of her motivations. Money grubbing whores can be very calculating. Women have known this forever--thus why inherently we typically can't stand them with a passion. His story isn't the only one. It's just one of many lamenting stories I've heard in the last few years. I don't like what his ex did, but I don't feel sorry for him either. He got exactly what he asked for. Arm candy that expected to get paid.
Most are really looking for what I described to him. Someone who gets us, who we are, is genuinely into who we are, not our pocketbooks. No one deserves some money grubbing, gold digging whore who's simply telling us what we want to hear. As I have said, I'm pretty much an odd duck. This guy wasn't an odd duck. He could find a woman in her 50s who would probably love him more than his ex ever imagined he could be loved. He could've found her in the 10-15 years that he wasted on this money grubbing, little more than a welfare whore. That really is the big problem though. These little whores don't give a second thought to the fact the man in front of them could actually find someone that suits them. They are looking to have someone kiss their butts. They tell them what they want to hear. Then, they are on to the next drama once they've gotten what they wanted. For someone like me that's the odd duck, well, okay, I'm aware that I'm probably not meeting someone that views the world the way I do. So maybe the little whores don't really affect my outcome, regardless. But it pains me to watch my friends, male and female, suffer--both being made fools of and being more alone because of how everything eventually plays out.
Of course, some of these little whores get what's coming to them. I know a couple of guys my age I wouldn't piss on if they were on fire. They like to act like they have money, brag about things that they have, and to be blunt, are lying through their teeth. It's kind of hilarious to watch the little gold digging whores fall all over themselves and even talk trash to women closer to or the same age as these guys. They've cornered how to take advantage of it. They themselves are lying about how much money they have and taking the whores for the ride instead of the other way around. I gotta laugh when I see it. Although sometimes, these idiots manage to find a genuine woman and hurt them and then it's not all funny. However, the majority of the time they're hopping from gold digger to gold digger and it's hilarious. (Yes, admittedly I have a sick sense of humor.)
Is there some simple answer for the people that are just looking for love? Well of course there is. Go after someone that shares common interests. If they don't, don't waste your time. If everything that they say is exactly what you want to hear, think about it. No one, and I mean no one, ever tells you exactly what you want to hear. Only a whore with other goals has that luxury. We can blame the gold diggers all we want, but the truth is far more ugly. Guys like to have their egos stroked and there are a lot of younger women that will take advantage of it. A friend said he's just having sex. Yea, that's why the last 3 people that crushed his heart were nothing more than money grubbing whores, because we all know inevitably we fall for someone that is in front of us. And, shockingly, it's not hard to fall for someone who tells us everything that we want to hear, especially if we're having sex with them. Hell, in all honesty, I think it's easier for men to get suckered in like that than women. Most women by nature seem to get a little suspicious when we hear exactly what we want to hear. Are there couples with some years between them that work? Oh heck yes. But your odds go way up as a woman gets younger and younger than the man that she is only there for the money. I told a friend once look for that woman that looks at you like you're the only man in the room. Not the one that stares at you and constantly agrees and seems to fidget if certain men come into the room. The one who when she looks into your eyes you can see her, the depth of her and she seems to never lose sight of you even when you are not in her direct line of sight. The eyes are the window to the soul, and the window to the heart. The heart will always show its true intentions through the eyes even when every other action is made to say something else.
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