So last year's new year's promises to myself...for my newer readers, I never make resolutions. I try to keep all the promises I make to others so it just makes more sense to make promises to myself of what I want to do for me. I've discovered after reviewing those new year's promises last year that I didn't keep all of them. But I did one hell of a job keeping the more important ones. So maybe some of the "less" important ones I'll just have to make come true in 2017. I think I was pretty ambitious given what a shit year 2016 was pretty much for everyone.
So first, what promises did I keep? More concerts--EPIC SUCCESS!! Duran Duran. Seriously. Who cares what other concerts I made? I actually saw Rick Springfield and entourage that included Night Ranger and the Romantics. And I saw a lot more local and regional bands!! Which truth be told is my favorite thing to do over riding my motorcycle. Love, love, love live music!! Enjoy my life, even if I don't have someone to share it with. Well, another success! I did manage to spend a small fortune on taking friends with me that couldn't afford to do the things that I like to do. I went to Charlotte for a race, and of course, did Darlington again this year!! Granted I've kind of decided that if you can't afford to go, I may or may not be willing to foot the bill. Some people prove to be very, very unappreciative and even weasel out of the things they said they would pay for. Neither here nor there! It was awesome!! I enjoyed every minute regardless because the one thing that I definitely had learned in 2015 was that you decide if someone else is going to ruin your good time. And no one is ruining my good time anymore when I'm doing something special. Still don't understand why anyone would do this--create drama or an argument to ruin what otherwise would be an awesome memory. But, I just don't actually care why anymore. If we need to argue it out, we can do that after we get home and by then guess what? Who cares? Because the good times overcast whatever wasn't "right". More time with friends? Hell yes!! I went to St Patty's in Savannah with one of my best friends to visit another best friend and his girlfriend!! We had so much fun!!! By spending more time with my friends, I found out which ones weren't worthy also. That's good though. It was a year to spend with real friends--and that means weeding out the less worthy. There are some friends that I will go out of my way for. And if you are one of the friends that survived this year and still hear from me fairly regularly, well, count yourself in that group. I'm a loyal and dedicated friend--but another 2015 lesson--only to those that prove loyal to me. To those that have been, thank you!! I love you even if we only talk a couple times a year!! Less time doing what other people want me to do. I have spent the last 20 years of my life doing what everyone else wanted to do. I like to just follow sometimes. It's easy and I'm not really a picky person, but damn it. What I learned in 2015 was that some people will take advantage of that to the nines. Everyone needs someone that respects what they want to do at least once in a while. I do a lot for others when I can, but I finally learned that doing for myself isn't a damn crime. This year really helped me redefine those limits. I'm very proud of myself. The biggest, most major, beyond epic success?!?!? Less time with draining people!! Like I said some people don't hear from me anymore at all. They don't realize what a drain they can be. It has to be their way. Or they are drunks. Or they just backstab the hell out of other people in front of me which means it's likely they are backstabbing the hell out of me when I'm not there making sure they are behaving themselves. WTH. Well, no, not WTH. Buh, buh, bye. So that's 6 out of 10 promises that I have been super at this year!! YAY ME!!!
What 4 did I miss? Beach. Didn't go to the beach once this year. Who cares? I went to two races, concerts, rode my motorcycle whenever I wanted. Hiking. No, didn't do that this year either. Okay so those are so minor, plus so easily moved to 2017. Germany. Well, Morg is going to be in Germany until the summer....so yes, technically another one easily moved to 2017. And the final promise, finish my novel. Well, it's halfway done. So for someone working full time and living my life my way and working on a non-profit for vets with PTSD. I'm thinking I've done pretty good getting it halfway. So moving the completion to 2017 isn't a failure by any means.
So what promises for this year? Well, let's see.
1. We'll bunch the superficial ones into one. Go hiking more. Go to the beach. Go to the Joe for the last Red Wings season at the Joe. Go to a Clemson game in Death Valley. Go to a bowl game. Go to my brother's wedding. Go to more concerts. Go to Darlington again. Maybe try Bristol or the Brickyard 400 this year. Drags in Charlotte or Atlanta. Roller coasters--another favorite thing. Maybe this is the year to do Sturgis!!
2. Visit more friends that live elsewhere. I have friends in Arkansas, Florida, Tennessee, Michigan, Ohio, Pennsylvania, Kansas, Hawaii, Italy, Illinois, Wisconsin, California....Let's consider this a success if I get to 3 this year. Sounds do-able.
3. So this one. I've thought about it, a lot. I don't actually want a bad relationship, but I don't actually want to be alone either. I got rid of the nightmare list in 2016 I had been keeping for the last decade that seemed more counterproductive to meeting the "right" guy. Granted with a lot of poking and proding from my sister, and a couple of my best friends. I now focus on the positives of someone, rather than looking for my way out. If I need a way out, I don't need to be with "that" guy. But I also know that I've met a couple guys over the last year that I wouldn't need an "out". That stupid list was actually hurting more than it helped. As of February this year, I would've been married. I've wrote about it before. One of my best friends wanted to marry me for over 15 years. Until he died a couple years back. We had agreed that we would marry for his 50th birthday if we were both still single. That would be this February. If he had been the "one", I would've married him one of the several times that he asked. But, again, maybe that has been counterproductive too. I always had that fall back plan--my safety net. Of course, it really hit me this year that net is gone. I don't want the wrong relationship, and that would've been the "wrong" one, but getting rid of the list. Well, I've realized the "right" relationship isn't that hard to find. We make it hard because we keep dwelling on what we don't want--our fears--especially of repeating mistakes or poor choices of the past. We self sabotage ourselves when something good presents itself because when you take that leap the risk is there, and I am as guilty as anyone else. But like I stated, dumped that list, and yes, granted a couple of guys that presented themselves were more nonsense than they were worth, but I cussed them out and dropped them faster than the drama they could spew got started. An awesome side effect to getting rid of the list. Instead of saying I can date him for a while and that will annoy me more later. Nope. Bye. However, in case you missed it. I also met a couple guys that have a lot of positives. I'm not saying that any of the ones that showed potential this year are the "right" one, but I think my odds--just by my own outlook--have gone up exponentially. So while this is a tall order, and a promise that might be much harder than any of them I made myself last year or any year for that matter, I think I owe it to myself--and my friend's memory. He thought the sun rose and set in me. While I have always thought that was seriously overkill, and even a bit overwhelming, I have to admit that as intelligent as he was, he couldn't have been completely wrong. So I promise myself that if the "right" relationship presents itself I will actually be "all in".
That's it. I think that last one is a doozie, so I think 3 is all I can handle this year. I wish all my friends a very Merry Christmas or Happy Holidays for my Wicca, agnostic, Jewish, et ales friends, and for all of you a very Happy New Year and best wishes for a very wonderful and fruitful 2017.
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